twinks, twinkie, twinkler: 1998-2010

we gathered in the vet's office with twinkie bundled in a blanket. her old eyes glancing around at us as we sat trying not to cry yet. we chatted about all the great times she had- like when she would do wilbur flips or when she managed to eat my entire 18th birthday cake. we laughed about how she would protect us from any outsider or how she ran the house like an old spinster. we recalled how she was such a part of the family that she knew when something was wrong. she would take care of anyone who was sick or injured and stay by their side until they were better. i remembered how she would cuddle into bed with me (when dad's door was closed, of course) and how she would get mad at me if i moved in the night. we remembered her fat stage with fondness (she was just big boned) and we laughed about her cranky dieting years. we thought about how she suddenly became a young buck when gertie, the puppy, was brought home and how she taught that puppy all her grape-eating tricks. we watched her age and gray but i think we all still saw her as the little runt puppy we brought home years ago. now our little runt puppy was sick and we were sad.

she had lived a life full of love- maybe a life too long, but we did everything possible to keep her here as long as we could. a few weeks before christmas, it was time to say goodbye to the best dog i have ever known. we laid her in the blanket, gathered around her and put our hands on her to let her know we were there for her. and then she passed.

it was a very difficult experience for our family- far more difficult than i would have imagined, but we are slowly moving on. as the vet offered his condolences, he reassured us that she was finally back to her running self wherever she may be. i can't imagine it any different. i am sure she is begging for heavenly dog treats and lounging on a comfy cloud- barking if the angels' parties get too loud. after all, as cade was sure to remind me, all dogs go to heaven.

we love you, twinks.